No doubt that adoption is harder than getting pregnant. Here's a comparison.
Getting Pregnant: Helloooooo sailor. Looking for a good time?
Going through Adoption: Hello? Um, is this the FBI? Yes, I'd like to schedule my background check.
Getting Pregnant: Ooohhh.... do that thing with your fingers again. Oh. YES!
Going through Adoption: Getting fingerprinted by the State Police, FBI and Homeland Security.
Getting Pregnant: Dinner for two: $100, Movie tickets: $25, hotel room: $165
Going through Adoption: Application fee: $200, Dossier translation: $700, In-country fee: $16,500
Getting Pregnant: No baby, seriously. You're the only one I've gone unprotected with.
Going through Adoption: Mandatory HIV, TB, Syphillis, Cholestrol, STD, Blood Pressure testing
Getting Pregnant: Ohgodohgodohgod.... is that a blue dot?!
Going through Adoption: Ohgodohgodohgod.... is that blue ink? Shit. It needs to be in black ink.
Getting Pregnant: Oooooh baby.. call the fire department. I'm feeling hot.hot.hot!
Going through Adoption: Calling the fire department to do a mandatory home inspection.
Getting Pregnant: Silly boy.. did you just poke me with something?
Going through Adoption: Getting poked by needles and giving 3 viles of blood for the dossier.
Getting Pregnant: Simple spelling: T-o-m. D-i-c-k. H-a-r-r-y.
Going through Adoption: Uzbeck. no. Uyzbik.. no. Ugh. nevermind. It's one of the 'Stans.
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3 comments:
Hmmm, I don't know. I think it's only easy to get pregnant if you really, really, really, DON'T want to be pregnant.
Funny but not THAT funny, as it's all true! And, in our case, instead of taking 9 months, it will be 24! Argh.
Melissa, can I PLEASE post these on my blog....of course with credits going to you! That is soooo funny and I needed that laugh!
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