I'm going to go to hell for most of these posts

Honest to God things that were said during the dossier process that sounded naughty but really weren't.

1. "Let's go check out your bedroom."
-fire marshall. Said during home inspection to ensure fire alarms were working.

2. "Are you here for your STD test?"
-nurse. STD clearance is part of the medical portion of the homestudy and dossier.

3. "If this is your first time, you'll feel the poke and it may hurt. Just relax."
-nurse. Blood tests are a mandatory part of the dossier. By the way, it wasn't my first time.

4. "Spread them a little wider so I can roll it a bit better."
-FBI. For some reason my fingerprints were not easy to take and/or read.

5. "Let's try again. I need to get all the nooks and crannies."
-FBI. Again, my fingerprints were not scanning correctly.

6. "Do I need to get down on my hands and knees and wash underneath?"
-me to social worker prior to her first homestudy visit.

7. "Do your research on nipples."
-homestudy workshop. Explaining that when you take your baby out of the babyhouse and bring her home, you'll want the pacifier and bottle nipples to be as similiar as possible to what she may have been using. It will make the transition easier for her.