If Only Tasha aka Rev. Kent Could Be Smart Enough to Save the World

In the 1970s, my alter ego was Jaime Somers, the Bionic Woman. In the 2000s, it was Sydney Something -- The multi-lingual, multi-haircolored kick-ass super-secret double agent from Alias.

In between those two eras, I was Sandy Kingston from Sunshine Beach Timeshare resorts that called lonely senior citizens between the hours of 9am to 9pm trying to get them to hand over their life savings for a timeshare in Malaysia. Nevermind the time I was Klamee Dia down at the Beaver Hut strip club. Somehow I never made more than $2 in tips.

And in 2007, since I already have a knack for creating really elaborate alter egos with outrageous back stories, It would only make sense for me to use my new personas to do crazy shit on the internet.

But some suburban mom beat me to it.

Meet Shannen Rossmiller (pictured, right). For the past few years she's been doing what the CIA/FBI/Interpol couldn't do - track down terrorists via blogs, chatrooms, instant message, and email.

When 9/11 happened, the mom of three decided to buy a copy of The Koran For Dummies (seriously). From there she started communicating on pro-Arabic, anti-West websites in Arabic by using Google translation software and using repeatitive flowery prose akin to a "Hallmark card for jihads.'

In no time, she's got a few Arabic male aliases and setting up email accounts such as khadija1417@hotmail.com for her Abu Khadija alias and she's buying missiles from jihadis off the internet! (Initially supplied by the Americans in the eighties, natch.) Ironically, over at the FBI, agents are still waiting for approval to open up a simple Yahoo! mail account to create aliases as well.

In no time, Shannen is capturing Al Queda leaders, US Servicemen stationed in Iraq who are trying to help terrorists, wanna-be suicide bombers and a gamut of terrorists.

Her story is incredible. Click here to read about her.

Now if only I could be as productive during my waiting period.